ObstinateSparrow Posted March 20, 2022 Share Posted March 20, 2022 This is not a story or anything like that. It's simply humor. With all the frustration Ark can cause, sometimes it's best to pull back and relax. Humor is said to be the best medicine. Aside from being (hopefully) humorous, these will be examples of what can happen when we make an unintended typo, don't take into account words with double meanings, or write things in an ambiguous way. Disclaimer: This humor post is in English. If translated to another language, the humor will be lost. Sorry. First up is a line from an article I read regarding the creatures of Ark, and an example of what can happen when a typographical error slips by. It is about the beaver, and reads as follows: "These creatures are very friendly and will attack you only if you try to acquire resources from a dame they've built, or if you attack them directly." Those are some talented beavers! Next up are a few headlines. They are based on real headlines but I've altered them slightly to give them an Ark twist. The first three are grammar gaffes, and in the last two a word's double meaning wreaks riotous havoc. ENRAGED DODO INJURES SURVIVOR WITH HATCHET MISSING OTTER FOUND BY TREE VELONASAUR SHOOTS MAN WITH KNIFE SPARROW TRIBE GETS SHOT AT NEW TEK BASE NARCOTIC PRODUCTION REACHES NEW HIGH If you like these, I'm sure I can rustle up some more. Feel free to make your own contributions as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Griffin998 Posted March 23, 2022 Share Posted March 23, 2022 This is beautiful. Better than the greats...Charlie Chalico, Karkinos Hart. (If you don't recognize these names, they're Charlie Chaplin and Kevin Hart) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ObstinateSparrow Posted March 23, 2022 Author Share Posted March 23, 2022 Thanks. What's hysterical is that these are all based on real headlines, and the first is word-for-word from a real article. I made a few more, this time sentences that are once again based on real things people wrote. And these people were not even trying to be funny! We watched in horror as Fred ran from a charging Triceratops clad only in his underwear. By order of the Tribe Leader, Brontosaurs blocking the base entrance or riding Enforcers in the lobby is hereby forbidden. This book is dedicated to my parents, Helena Walker and God. I saw the dead dodo riding back to base. The Hyaenadon was hungry and made the mistake of nipping a child that was trying to force-feed it in his ear. (PS: I'll probably name my Megaloceros Kevin, since Hart is an old-timey name for deer. And the Chalicotherium can be Charlie!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Griffin998 Posted May 4, 2022 Share Posted May 4, 2022 I have some more, these are real headlines that I've twisted into ARKy headlines Tames are getting into their owners’ edibles and overdosing on narcotic Icthyosaur impaled with 'spear-like object' is found dead on Southern Islets, admins say Procoptodon missing from Alpha tribe found in base after disappearing during raid Alpha tribe Icthyosaur stranded on Southern beach dies after beach bob tries to tame the animal, tribespeople say Alpha tribe member, level 59, dies after hitting 45-foot Sarcosuchus in Writhing Swamps ISLAND NEWS Body bag of missing beach bob found after 'encounter with a dire bear,' tribe mate says Enjoy, and happy ARKing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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