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Journey not in my shadow but forge your own path......


RequiemAngel

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I wrote this story then shelved it  and I  just came back to it today. I am going to post it to see if there would be any interest in me continuing or if anyone would like to read it. I forewarn you tho I am dyslexic and I am working on my spelling and grammar so I apologize in advance for any errors in the story. so please let me know if you would like to see the story continued and polished.

 

In the beginning.........

 

He stood still like the predator he was, partially hidden on the high bluff of the cold rugged mountain. Its chill mist a welcoming cloak for his misery of existence. A being of two races and neither wishing to accept him for what he had to become,  what Ark had forged him to be. His mind embracing, remembering what this valley was once like, and oh stranger I wish you were here when the valley sang with soft, whispering voices of the Elves on the playful valley breezes.The dwarves beating their hammers in tune with their deep baritone forging weapons and tools like you will never see again. 

Then there was the joyful laughter and playful banter of scholars and clerics from the academy. The place had vibrant life then, it had a purpose that was inclusive of all races. We all had a light and purpose that we selfishly took for granted. Now ruins lie where there was buildings that reached towards the heavens and the vegetation crept among them wrapping them in a mossy embrace.

We did not appreciate what we lived with everyday, what knowledge and joy we had been given. A free people we were not bound as we are now in invisible rigid chains, not steeped in bone-numbing regret.

Shuddering, he pulled in a deep, chilled lungful of air that abruptly brought him back from his memories. The sun was just beginning to caress the beacon, and it was time for him to move before he was discovered here.

But, I digress, and I know you, the stranger, that wandered into my house, want the answers, and how shall I give them? How shall I. the outcast. give you what you so badly want to hear? You long to learn to go where no footsteps have not tread in so long and what will you give in return, what will you become in this journey? Oh stranger, I wish you no ill will, but how shall I prepare you for what is to befall you, for the betrayals that will come and the doubt that will over shadow you in your travels?

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For a dyslexic, you sure know how to spin a tale and write really, really well. I have met plenty of dyslexics and you are the first I have met that can write so well.

You had very few grammer and punctuation issues that I could see. God forbid I miss any, after all I'm a grammer freak. The  again, I generally leave out a lot of grammer in my posts...

Considering your condition, I'll copy and paste, it then add in the missing commas. Then I'll post it here for you.

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Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. I spend long hours in Libre working on gamma and spelling using the corrections it gives me then going into an online dictionary to double check and try to learn the word I have problems with. I am going to work on the first chapter as I have the notes fleshed out,  now I need to put it into sentences and make a cohesive story from the notes.

 

I have made a picture of the male character so you can get an idea of who he is as you read the story.

 


Ark%20character%20Male.png

 

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The start of chapter one and I'm sorry its taken this long to publish it. I will add the rest of chapter one in a few days time.

 

Chapter 1

As he rounded the corner he spied Anara as she walked over to Meathead the head Trex that hadn’t been well the last few days. Stroppy with most humans he gently lowed his massive head so that she could cradle it and caress his nose. With her he was putty and not the roaring bite your head of monster to the rest of us and chief intimidator of all. You could see it in his defeated stance that all was not well and he was losing the fight to stay on his feet. You had to feel sorry for the half baked old thing as he had wormed his way into all our hearts and as one people we hoped for a full recovery for him.

Towards the hard baked land to the south the farming delegation for the day gaily laughed and gathered their tools to check the plots and bring back supplies to the community. A few of the older hunters joined them as guards as more carnivores had been seen on the ridge line. This was not usual and was causing some unease in the community. It was going to be a busy day for them and the sun was already scorching the retina's so he didn’t envy them at all.

Merging with the building he slipt silently passed so as to try not to disturb Anara and Meathead but he felt that monster knew he was there. He made it to the guest quarters unnoticed finally but to be sure he made another sweep of surrounding area. Even after all this time he couldn't, shouldn't let his guard down as it had kept him alive all this time.

His hand rested on the warm metal of the door for just a brief moment before he pushed it open. Sighing he closed it again and looked over his shoulder towards the guest eating area. The stranger was not up and he shouldn't really call him the stranger as they knew him from a time so long ago. Unbidden h
e allowed his mind to drift to that fateful day, his surrounding disappearing allowing the mists and echoes of a time past to slip like an old friend across his mind.

The day was warm not to hot
as he remembered it with the tang and earthiness reaching his nostrils like a fine wine. The languid sea breeze played about the beach scuffing up errant pieces of sand. The vegetation lush and green rustled in tune with the breeze concealing the dubious movements of the annoying Compys as they mischievously played with the Ark Residents just not quite enough for one of there pack rushes.

On the beach the
far off horizon, flaring hues of the sun melting into the sky and ocean like molten metal in the blacksmiths forge. Ragged rocks reared towards the heavens harboring unknown terrors that took the unwary but for the Carbonemys who lazily swam about without a care, as the Parasaur's stately marched in pairs or a single one here and there as Trikes swaggered into view to claim their favorite browsing spot. The sea was restless and moved with ungainly grace towards the shore tho not enough to cause alarm among the residents. Nothing was out of place as far as Ark was concerned just another day to be thankful to be alive to enjoy.

His
cold, steal grey eyes swept to the surf as did a few of the hunters as a Carno broke cover of the trees rushing at something in the water before it veered of strangely and coming to a stop to inspect what was lying there. A few of the hunters brandished their spears and rushed the Carno pushing it back to the tree line with the added security of arrows that flew with precision as it was just an adolescent and didn’t know to press its advantage. I saw our Lady grab some of the women and Hunters and rush to the surf line where they pulled something from the surf.

He was an outsider and I do not know why that came to my mind, just a fleeting memory I guess as none of us seem to carry memories of before we entered this Ark. He was tall around 6 feet or so I guess. Solid boned and by the looks of those muscles used to work or something similar. He had the looks of a warrior with scar marks rippling across his body in livid white glory as they had not been treated as they should have and been left to heal as they will. Like the rest if us he carried the implant and he wont be happy with that I wager. But a gut reaction to this man was strong, very strong. He was a danger to us all a harbinger of ill will and change and that is something that we as a people did not need. I met the Lady eyes and she could plainly see what I was feeling and by the looks she was having the same doubts as I.

If I had known now what I do I would have made them throw him back. Let the sea take him and be free of what he brings. But I am ahead of myself and our lady made the right choice to surrender him to those we will not speak of.

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  • 1 month later...

I felt her hand on my shoulder that broke my reverie. I placed my hand on hers no words needed to be said as she knew where I traveled to. She was such an enigma as she allowed no one near her as in a mate and there was no shortage of offers. She dedicated all her time to the care and welfare of others. Always there for those in need and seem to be so self reliant she didn’t need others to lean on. The rumors went it was because of so long ago she was mated with one from another clan, an arranged marriage that was happy for them both but the happiness died when he was tragically killed by a T-Rex that had broken into the compound late one foggy night.

I got up to sit by the fire where she handed me a bowl berries to start the morning, my favourite by far. I could hear the stranger enter the common area and was informed by the Lady that a council meeting will be convened to discuss his petition  in two moons rising as some of the council had to make a dangerous journey to get here. She would extend the hospitality of the clan until such time as they make a decision and then if denied she expected him to leave immediately without further delay. I groaned inwardly as I didn’t want him here  and all that he represented. Why the hell had she done that as the Clan was healing, moving forward and willing to put the past behind us for the good of all.

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From your first piece to this one, I have seem a large improvement to your vocab and I want to read more of it. Looking forwards to the next part.

My only quarrel with your pieces are the grammar and punctuation and the occasional tid bit of poor english. A comma here instead of there can change the meaning of a sentence drastically.

eg

Let's eat Grandma - this is saying that they are going to eat the Grandmother

Let's eat, Grandma - this is saying they are going to eat and bidding Grandma to join them.

 

Work on those things and you'll be a Grandmaster of Wordsmithing in no time. Looking forwards to when you start using it well. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Three days later..............

Like gaunt-eyed wraiths, they came out of the dead of night. Bridles muffled, saddles covered to hide Clan markings. Thick dark fur hoods covered their faces not revealing any noticeable features or markings. The Tribe stood silently to welcome them and I could not help but allow the tears fall. It had been way too long since they were here, torn from us by force and necessity. The mist clung in cloying tendrils around us cloaking us from the outside and all torches were dimmed so if there were prying eyes they could not see what was happening.

 

One by one in the perfect measured single file they turned towards the handlers and came to a uniformed halt. As one movement, they got off from their powerful muscular Dino’s and handed the reins to the Hostlers. Then again in one movement which was a beauty to behold at their uniform grace turned and marched toward me. I embraced each one and welcomed them home until the last.

 

We looked at each other slowly appraising the other. He had grown older, harder with a skin of light brown parchment and eyes that had changed from the exposure of the sun, wind and rain. But he was still battle hardened, still, the ramrod man I knew all those years ago. Throwing custom out to the wind, he enfolded me in a bear hug his voice clear in my head of rejoicing at being back. I held him tight, letting the tears flow. They were home, they had returned to the Tribe.

 

We all retired to the guardian's hut where I had food and drink waiting for them. I knew they would be tired from the tortuous slow ride they had. Windows were tightly shuttered with guards posted around the perimeter with their backs to the building facing out. Riders on Raptors took the second perimeter and the T-Rex Riders on the outside. I was leaving nothing to chance. Direwolves and Sabres prowled the compound forever watchful on high alert.

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