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Fresh Survivor of the Ark (PARODY)


BigBobomb

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Now this is a story all about how my tribe got flipped turned upside down

and I'd like to take a minute craft a chair and park I'll tell you about my journey throughout the arks

 

On the island I was born and raised in the swamplands is where I spent most of my days

dying respawning and dying some more every morning 10+ titanboas outside of my doors

when a couple of guys, anarchy their name spotted a 150 quetz we were trying to tame

got in one little fight we were doomed to be wiped

raided anarchy and moved to the center that night.

 

The Center map was the new land try and take alpha was always the plan

20+ in tribe boy we were in luck there was no alpha the Devs just switched it up 

and when I say that what I really mean server was pve just last week 

needless to say we were all power hungry poor pve'ers didn't even know what was coming

 

they were astonished by how quickly we grew full metal base in a day or two 

a small little egg farm then came the quetz I won't even say I'm sure you know the rest.

 

Next thing you know we got a Female neighbor but something was strange about her behavior

the virgins went nuts they were bringing her stuff there was even talk of recruiting her up

but I said no I don't like how she acts plus my premonitions was telling me that she's wack

and wouldn't you know my thoughts were facts turns out the chick had 2 balls and a sack

 

All of them man were they embarrassed said you can't pretend you're a girl that just isn't fair and

they started to plot and they started to ploy. All saying This pretend woman must be destroyed

 

but dawn the heshe had a trick up her sleeve a move that would bring valor down to our knees

Mic-less tribemate named John been with us from the swamps 

kicked everyone from the tribe and made the new leader dawn

 

 

 

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2 minutes ago, theronin said:

LOL!!  Cool read man.  Was that supposed to be a poem?  I like your cerativity and your story.

YES - many players will take on women avatars just for this very reason.  Sad but it works.

Have you ever seen fresh prince of belaire? It's supposed to be a parody to the theme song! Lol and actually unfortunately it was not creative it all really happened. It's a true story ?

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